You try to shape your world, your life, from such ideas and thought patterns until you come up against something that is so enormous you can not find a tidy way to avoid it, and then all your certainties, your beliefs and thought patterns, are swept away. You fall into a deep hole and this can bring up an overwhelming amount of fear. You can also call this “the dark night of the soul”, and it is a frightening experience. At the same time, there is the possibility that you can become open and realize you no longer know the “right” way, and then a part of you gives up, while another part opens up. The part that gives up is the defensive, resisting part that always thinks it knows better, that is impatient, that wants and demands all kinds of things from life. That part often dies away in a crisis, and if you dare to let it die, the light can begin to shine inwardly
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